Post-Conceived Notion

The BFP details:

I tested a week earlier than I had planned, last Sunday. I wouldn't have tested, except DH knew I was in limbo and he asked as we woke up Sunday morning, “Are you going to test?”. So, I did, and DH read the results for me, a faint but obvious BFP! I was being quiet about it online, waiting to be more sure, and received my positive on the digital yesterday.  Though there was no fooling Mrs. Spit, and I thank her for her thoughts and prayers. I am still pregnant.  

My first hope is for a sticky healthy full term pregnancy! I've never ever ever been here before. I've wanted to be here pretty much my entire life. I just hope all goes well. Once it sinks in, I know I will feel overwhelmed by the responsibility and all that must be done.  Not only do I have a junk room to transform into a nursery, but a job that no one can take over.  Both things require preparation.

I'm happy about many things right now. I have a new way to reconnect with some old friends, one who will be having a baby in March. But, I am going to wait as long as I can (I doubt I'll make it to 12 weeks) to tell my family and coworkers. I will tell everyone just before the rumor mill picks up speed. 

At work last week I kept expecting everyone to just know, or expecting me to give it away somehow. But, I didn't. Most coworkers know we're trying. Thankfully no one asked for an update as I'm a terrible liar.  If asked maybe I'll just say, "I wish" as in, "I wish I could tell you."  Then it will only be a lie of ommission. :)

I also felt guilty when talking with my mom on the phone.  But, if I tell my family it will make it back to my work place within a matter of days. I could ask them to keep it quiet, but I think it would be more fun if everyone knew and no one had to exercise restraint. This will be the first grandbaby on both sides of the family. Since we've been married for 9 years, everyone (but me and possibly my mother) has been surprisingly patient.

Besides, I want to think of a fun way to tell everyone.  I was looking at some of the pregnancy shirts on Cafe Press, they are pretty funny.  Ideally I'd put the ultrasound pic on a T shirt, but I don't think I can wait that long.  I'm going to call my doctor tomorrow.  At my preconception appointment he said not to be in a hurry to call after getting a BFP, so I doubt they do early scans for "routine" pregnancies.

Last but NOT least... lucky number 7. A month ago I would've told you it was a long and torturous journey. But, rationally I know seven months is not very long to try. Thank you (yes you) for your support and commiseration. I am NOT more deserving or more ready than any one of you. If I had my way, each and every one of us would begin the journey to parenthood exactly when we are committed to being parents, and not a moment later. You have every right to whatever you feel when people out in this blog world announce their BFPs!

Of course this means my blog will change from a TTC blog to a whiny pregnancy blog. In the past, I have heard people complain about problems I only wish I had, and I'm afraid I'm destined to commit that sin myself. It also means this blog title is a bit outdated.  I've liked it very much but it is time for a change. Maybe something along the lines of "Oven at Work". What do you think?

Whatever the case, I will continue to read your stories, follow your journeys, and offer my support so long as you want it. I hope I can still be your blogfriend from this side of the BFP line and that you can cross over and join me soon!