Until recently I didn't totally understand how TTC could be stressful or put a strain on a relationship. Now, though I'm nowhere near those who have been in the trenches and would not minimize their experiences for anything, I'm starting to get the smallest inkling of a picture... after not even completing 1 cycle...
I'm sure most of it is my fault for being so tightly wound about this. Part of me wishes I could just let it happen. The other part of me has wanted this /forever/ and yesterday isn't soon enough. Another part of me has an ideal timeline, any deviation from which would be a catastrophe. The latter two parts seem to be overriding the first part.
CD15, my OPKs have all been very light or nonexistent. My CM is creamy at best. We shall see what today holds. Now I'm stressed that being stressed is going to delay ovulation.. Sigh.
Today I will try to just flow and rise above and see how that works.
Last night I had a dream I was breastfeeding my baby.
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1 comment:
what a beautiful dream. Praying it comes true.
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